people who design the yearbooks

After work the people at my job, who work in the air conditioned offices high above, like to drink at the local bar called 'the Angry Scallion'. I've never been invited to attend before until today.

I said, "Sure, why not?"

Being a man who likes his booze, I was never the type to miss a drinking opportunity. Also, the social gathering would be a good start, in my quest to change the way I am percieved at work. I've been labled weird many times because I am not much of a talker. Especially when there is nothing to be said. I'm not into bullshitting. But I am not 'weird' and I want to show that. A relaxed social situation was what I needed. The hot female colleagues were a bonus.

When work was over, I did my last remaining chores at the shipyard and said fairwell to the other uninvited employees. Suckers. Then I walked over to the Angry Scallion. Although the name of the pub makes the place sound like a dive joint, in actuality, it is a nice place for the ladies to relax. Painted in pastel colors and lit with, I forget the name of those fucking lights, I call them christmas lights. I entered slowly scanning the dim room for my co-workers. Not sure if they were there or not because they get off an hour before I do. Lucky for me, they were still there, a group of six people.

"Tom! You came! Let me introduce you to Bob, Janet, Denise, Harry,...", the girl speaking was Latasha, a black beauty of a woman whose looks I have been appreciating from a distance since I started working at the shipyard 8 years ago. As she was making the introductions, she gestured slowly clockwise to the occupants of the table. "...and Marie... did I forget anybody? Me? But of course, you know me."

"Hey everyone."

"Hi Tom.", they all spoke, almost in unison. I was appreciative of the attention. I pulled up a chair and ordered a beer from the waitress and they got back into what they were doing before I had arrived, which happened to be off-the-cusp trivia questions. They were very knowledgeable. All of the questions came from the top of their heads. Most of the questions revolved around old televsion shows and movies.

After a few questions, I realized that I was not very good at this game.

"What was the name of all of Roseanne's kids on Roseanne?"

"Ooh, I know this one. Darlene, Becky, and DJ."

"You are correct!"

"I have one! What show, that is on the air now, is filmed on the set where 'the Burbs' was filmed?"

"That is an easy one, Desperate Housewives."

I did not have a clue to any of these questions. Yeah, I was familiar with the shows, but not the details. And in the process of trying to listen to the questions and trying to figure them out, I became conscious of the fact that I was becoming very quiet. I was becoming the anti-social character that I disliked. I had to come up with a question of my own.

"Hey guys, I have a trivia question for you. In Rocky II, what did Rocky say when he could not catch the chicken?"

Silence. They were animated in excitement a few seconds ago, but my question seemed to have quelled that excitement. I thought for sure that someone would know the answer to this one. Afterall, Rocky was such an icon. All the quotes from that film is etched in stone somewhere.

"Nope, don't know that one.", said Janet.

Ok, maybe the ladies would not know the answer to this one, but the guys should definitely know.

"Nope, don't know that one either. What is it?"

Defeated in my attempt to connect, I revealed the answer to be, "I feel like a Kentucky Fried idiot." The trick to a good trivia question is to not stump, it is to be able to make a question that people can answer, but after a moment of thought. The questions are there to help people feel closer through a common understanding. At this task I failed.

After a moment of silence, someone else had a question that got the table buzzing with excitement again. Glad that the table moved on, I started to listen to the questions and answers again, astonished on how little that I knew. But again, I became dissatisfied with the character I was becoming. How am I ever going to meet girls like this? The gathering will end soon, and sure I met Janet, Denise, and what the fuck her name is, but when this is over we would all part ways as if we never met. I needed another question.

I belted, "In Total Recall, what did Arnold say when the guy he was fighting, Richter, had his arms torn off in the elevator and fell to his death?"

Silence. I almost predicted this outcome because this question was harder than the Rocky one, but it was all I had.

I asked, "Did you all see the movie?"

"No."
"Yeah, I've seen it, but I don't remember that part."

"What did he say? Tom."

"He said, 'See you at the party Richter!' "

"Oh, I kind of remember that." was what someone said, Latasha I believed, and then the gathering adjourned.

Everybody parted ways and the night ended right there. Maybe they were happy, but I thought the night ended on a sour note. I thought perhaps I have become this WEIRD anti-social character because I am out of touch with the current cultural patterns or something. Maybe I am just getting old, but I were all relatively the same age. However, it was hard to deny that something was fundamentally different between us.

I am not an action buff or anything, I picked the questions because they belonged to the films that I grew up watching. The films that I watched repeatedly until I was able to memorize everything. Rocky, Rambo, Terminator, Total Recall, Robocop, and a slew of horror movies were the movies I grew up watching.

Those are all well known films. I know it is not me. Maybe I am over analyzing. But deep down inside...

---Tom -peace out